well. basically I feel right now that when you get down it is pretty easy to look up. I just had a meeting. it was really dumb. I stopped listening months ago. hah. just kidding ;) I stopped listening soemtime in the meeting. and then realized that they were talking about something I needed to listen to . so I attempted to replay what had happaned in my mind. it was hard. however. somehow in the meeting I started thinking. well first it was an awknoledgement that my feeligns will waiver between good and bad. and that I will be sad. whatever whatever. and the second was that. it doesn’t matter. I am/will be more so friends with morgan. we will still hang out. I still care for her so.. its all good. I guess. hahah.

specifically I think what I forgot - is that I have so much else goign on that I need to remember. I coudl program 20 webapps tonight and forget everything - from eating to being sad. hah. but I guess my point is that I have to think bigger than five minutes. especially bigger than five minutes ago. that is helpful.

oh and I am going to be updating 3gcoding.com soon.

so.. thanks to all my friends who have been there for me. especially john, my roomies, chris, morgan and jon. yall have really helped me. punks. hah. umm.