i can't sleep for the life of me. seriously.

it doesn’t work. having a crazy scedule where you are up from 11 to 6 and sleep from 6 to 9 and then are up from 9 until 6 is insane. it creates ghosts in my head. I was hanging out at work yesterday morning - about 24hrs ago - and I thought I heard voices calling my name. I scurried off home. full of fear of zombies and demons. it ruled. I even took a cab. cuz I didn’t trust the train. place is full of zombies.

there is almost no way in hell I am going to arrive at work tomorrow on time. but wtf. they did this to me. I mean. I tried to sleep. hahaha. but I keep wakign up at like 11 raring to go.

so I just read Haruki Murakami’s “Norwegian Wood.” it is so good. I quite like Murakami. his writing so very haunting. it reminds me of real life sometimes. or how I picture real life to be. if it were real. real life that is. all of his characters seem to have a dark cloud hovering above them at all times. something deep and brooding. it makes the characters seem more real than most novels that I read. well that may be alive. I love having feelings while reading a book. in the past six months it has happened three times - the first was in “the world accoding to garp” when garp’s son dies. that was sad. and how john irving used what we didn’t know to tell us was beautiful. it was really incredible how it worked out. but it was also so horrifying. I love being in a situation were I have to put down the book and think about it. as if I was actually involved. the book is an involvamatron. the next time was in anna karenina when levin and kitty got together. at the time my feeling was very strong - I could explain it to anyone - but now I am forgetting. it was great though. I think it was the theme. actually that whole book was incredible. I remember my friend thom mentioning that I should read it cuz it was his dads favorite. or something. I was like “i should.” and I did. it is one of my favorites I think as well.

so then the next time I was “moved” by a book was in norwegion wood - when watanabe is sad about naoko and he accidently ignores midori and hurts her - the letter that midori writes him is so sad. it really made me think for a bit.

sometimes though feelings are stupid. haha.

i just got a email from asstraffic. I imagine it is full of surprises and exciting offers for enlarging things. stupid things.

i need to read the great gatsby. someone buy it for me. ok. thanks.

i have been listening to mastodon. it is really good. I like it quite a but. my vocabulary sucks. I want to go on a date. I am tired.

heh. if you haven’t visited thom’s webpage you should his pictures are incredible. it makes me sad that I am not dong what he is doing. I miss the mountains and the nature and the whales. wtf. right.

i obviously shouldn’t write entries at 4:30 in the morning after reading a dark dark book.

i think one of my favorite things is reading a whole book in one sitting. I love abondoning things and doing something completely not related and just engaging 110%. it makes me feel so good. it could be my favorite thing. not abandoning things - but reading books. favorite above all.

oh yea. here are some pictures from work today. and after work I went to hard rock for a beer and saw gary colemon. wtf indeed. this is funny and this is awesome.